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A Fictional Rhyming Dictionary... (Home)
He ribs His Nibs with a glib fib ... about cribs and bibs.
"The bribed tribe" - that's a jibe at us scribes.
-ICE and ISE
'PRICELESS:' My tots do not take one slice of advice - however
concise. And they can't be enticed by wit's overnice spice.
But, so far, about price, I needn't think twice. Picking lice off the
mice - they're in paradise.
-ICH and -ITCH
'INFORMER'S REFORMER?' We want to convict a rich "witch." But, for her, our snitch has developed ... an itch.
What's the pitch -- will our snitch switch? (If so, he'll serve out his hitch in our niche.)
-ICHE (see also -EACH)
We do keep a niche for the nouveau riche, where we unleash a pastiche, with some sort of quiche.
'VIEWERS' COMPLAINT:' For a quick kick, we stole a hot flick. We wanted to click and see the chicks - but got picked up and then tricked.
Of course, we're too slick to get licked, but the bars and the
can look thick. (Me and Nick, we blame the "house dick.")
'BARGAIN:' The kid skid and slid well on the grid, but the greedy talent scout hid the lid on his bid.
'THREE ON A MATCH?' The beautified bride strides with pride, but in aside to her mentor and guide:
"Will we two ride the tide, or just slide?"
"With none on the side, you'll abide."
-IDGE and -IJ
'A HERMITAGE IN THE FOLIAGE:' On the ridge of a vine-crested bridge, lurks a satisfied midge.
"Hi, my shy guy. You -- a spy? Why? Think you're so sly?
"So get paid to lie. Well, you'll try to pry -- and get blown sky-high. You'll fry and you'll die."
-IEF see -EEF
My liege it's a siege.
'STRATEGIC WITHDRAWAL:' Wield a shield as you yield the field.
She was fierce; I was pierced.
-IEST (see also -EAST)
'CATHOLIC TASTES:' Our feast was policed by an ex-gourmet priest.
-IEVE see -EVE
-IEW see -UE
With strife rife in her life, the wife, at last, knifed.
If stiff old Cliff is clearly miffed, I sniff a whiff from a tiff.
'ECONOMIC DETERMINISM:' What caused their swift rift -- with short shrift?
His last gift proclaimed his drift towards thrift.
'CONTEMPT:' "How come this pig is in the brig?"
"He took a swig, then did a jig on His Honor's wig. Twig?" (Is that infra dig?)
-IGHT see -ITE
-IKE and -YKE
Who could strike that huge, pike-like spike through the dike? That tyke on the bike?
'WELL-GROOMED?' "Folks with style file down the aisle. Meanwhile, the groom's boy-like smile (with its wily guile) riles my bile.
"His motives? They're mercantile.
"Now, it's too late to revile ... that juvenile crocodile."
-ILED and -ILD
Our mild child got profiled as "wild."
The silk-ilk can bilk us and milk us.
'WILL POWER:' We try to kill Bill 'cause we're in his will.
He's ill, so we run a shrill drill on his windowsill.
Next, what we grill is less wholesome than swill.
Then -- for a chill-thrill, it's Bill that we spill down the hill.
But still our Bill is nowhere near nil.
Build up that guild - right now, it's weak-willed.
'HIGHLAND FLING:' There's a bonny Scotch lass well built to the hilt -- with a lilt -- and no guilt.
And she jilts that clown -while he's on his stilts.
So he tilts - and he's spilt in his kilts.
-IM (see also -EM)
'DRY GUY:' A slim, trim limb with vim can, on a whim, swim and skim to the rim.
Not in the swim, is prim him too grim for our gym?
-IME (and -HYME)
'TV's SUBLIME PARADIGM:' It's a crime for that slime to climb up to "prime time."
For ratings, he mimes grimy rhymes.
-IMF and -YMPH
A nymph knowed a lymph.
'DEFLATING:' That bureaucrat skimps whenever he scrimps. And that puts a crimp our national blimp.
Now it lies limp as a wimp.
-IMPT see -EMPT
-IN (see also -EN)
'AN ILL WIN:' The tenpins would spin - then, skin the twin's shins.
And, after the din, their kin would win (and sneak a thin grin).
They should discipline their adrenalin, from within - or switch to the violin.
'IS HYGIENE ROUTINE?' "I will mince to the prince -- once he's rinsed."
(She must BE convinced -- since his left-over blintz smears the palace
-INCH (see also -ENCH)
Once I pinched a ten-inch winch - a cinch, but (with that cop) I flinched in the clinch - so then I got pinched.
-INE and -IGN
'THE UNDERSIGNED:' The players - well, nine - signed on the line. Others hadn't the spine. When the nine did shine, the others would whine.
They would pine to dine on fine swine. From a stein, they drank the vine's cut-rate wine -- not resigned.
-INED and -IND (long sound)
'UNREFINED BUT STREAMLINED:' He's got a blind mind. But I can't be unkind: he's just in a bind not to wind up behind.
We're visiting this wingding ... and worshiping, also, our Bing - whom some date back to the Ching and the Ming.
But their mudslinging isn't discouraging. Our ardor isn't diminishing, and we wouldn't think of abandoning the darlings to whom we cling.
'ARSONIST:' I set fires, unhinged ... by a syringe binge.
My arrest might hinge on my sleeve's singed fringe.
I cringe with the tinge of a guilty twinge.
'CEO:' Promoted to chief of Rinky Dink Inc., I clink my pink drink, with a wink at my mink - though now I'm linked to a fink.
'SINKING FEELING:' I think: "But what's with my sink?"
I slink, with a blink, to the brink of its chink. (If that's not a REAL stink, I must call my shrink.)
-INT ( see also -ENT)
'SPORTING DIVERSIONS:' "My glint? It's meant to hint at my famous sprint stint. (So reporters won't squint at my splint.)
"Hearts of flint can tint their newsprint."
'DISAPPOINTED:' I said, "Bring me the Sphinx, not a lynx or a minx."
PHILOSOPHICAL GYM:' After a nip (just a sip on a drip), I skip with my whip.
But I trip, rip my lip -- and then chip my hip.
See why I flip?' "The hand with a whip ... brings on a bad trip."
That tip is a pip. Not a quip or a blip - it just might outstrip all
-IPE (and -YPE)
The tripe I swipe for my pipe is too ripe. (I type up this gripe - with no hype.)
-IR see -UR
-IRCH see -URCH
-IRE and -IAR
'SLAMMED BY A TELEGRAM:' "Who wired that our squire sired the choir?
"Someone he'd hired and fired? It's just mire.
"That liar may have lit his own pyre."
"That's right, Sire."
-IRF see -URF
-IRGE see -URGE
-IRS see -URSE
-IRST see -URST
-IRT see -URT
-IRV see -ERVE
-ISE see -IZE
'DEVILISH FOOD?' "Do dead fish wish to swish in a dish?"
"Tish, tish. And pish. That's heathenish gibberish."
'IN SILICONE VALLEY:' Even a brisk disk-whisk -- risks a frisk.
'LEADING MAN:' When I kiss to show bliss - but miss - the crowds hiss. (I blame my dentifrice.)
'SAVOIR FARE? ... NOT MUCH THERE:' This wit is famous and fit, but he also gets lit. So he sits, knits bits, and spits grits at the Ritz.
There his grits just hit the immaculate twit who carries his kit ... but, then, quits -- and splits, disconsolate. (For him, the wit's every line was a skit.)
Then don't be a blight. Don't be in flight to some trite plight. No, don't simply cite the "white knight."
You've a duty and right in a moral fight to proclaim your insight -- with might and with bite. (And, remember, you might be right - even if erudite.)
'TO THE HISTORIAN:' Let's have a megalith of a myth, forthwith, you wordsmith.
-ITHE and -YTHE
'NO CUT IN CONTRIBUTIONS:' If you're lithe and blithe with your scythe ... until all your siblings writhe, better tithe.
-IVE (short sound)
Either forgive -- or live for your shiv.
-IVE (long sound)
'CUTTING-EDGE REFORM:' Five wives strive (with knives) against lives that contrive to thrive in low dives.
'IN A FILM STUDIO:' "Fix these six mixed up pix."
"Nix - they're just for the hicks in the sticks."
"With your dirty tricks, WE'LL be in a fix. So shut up without being prolix."
'SHOW-BIZ QUIZ:' To TV's "Ms. Whiz," he uncorked his fizz.
Will it energize that judge, authorized to apprise?
Or will he chastise, criticize, and despise - that is, in a word,
The prism of his "ism" caused cynicism's schism.
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